You’re The Captain Of Your Destiny — Don’t Let Go Of The Wheel

Illuminating the pathway to success

You’re The Captain Of Your Destiny — Don’t Let Go Of The Wheel

by ajwebb

i was talking the other day to an acquaintance who had just taken his business under.  But that wasn’t the real problem.  In taking the business under, he had made some decisions that were borderline criminal and there was the possibility he would go to jail.
After explaining to me what had happened, which included an almost endless string of bad decisions, I asked him, “Did you know what you were doing was wrong?”
He replied that he did.
“Then why did you do it?” I asked.
“I had no choice,” he relied with resignation in his voice.  ”It was like I was swept along on this tidal wave and one bad decision led right into the next and it was like being on a freeway with no exit.  After awhile it was like I was outside my body wathcing someone else make all those bad decsions.”
ARE YOU KIDDING ME?  How convenient is that?  ”It wasn’t me who made all those bad decisions, I was watching someone else do it.”  Sounds like a great way to preserve your self esteem.  There was no choice.  Therefore, I’m not accountable.  The devil made me do it.  The light was dim.  My foot slipped.  I never got a fair chance in shool.  My parents didn’t love me.  I’m the victim here.  I had no other choice.
That’s a load of crap.  Let me stand right here and declare from the rooftops, “YOU ALWAYS HAVE A CHOICE.”  If you didn’t hear me, let me say it again.  You always have a choice.  You are not the victim of circumstance.  You can stand up anytime and anywhere and make a decision.  You’re not “swept away” by what’s happening.  You are the captain of your own destiny — don’t let go of the tiller.  If you don’t navigate these treacherous waters, who’s going to?  This is your life.  You can’t abrogate that responsibility.  Not now.  Not ever.  You only lose control of your life when you choose to give up control.
This scenario is all to familiar in corporate America today.  We see it on the news all the time.  It’s never the fault of the CEO.  I watched Bill O’reilly crucify senator Barney Frank (chief congressional oversight man over the fanny mae and freddy mac debacle) because he wouldn’t stand up and say, “This happened under my watch.  Therefore I’m responsible.”  Instead all he could talk about was how it was the fault of the republicans, his parents, his third grade teacher, his old scoutmaster, the guy down the block, and anyone else he could dredge up.  None of it was his fault, even though he was the man with ultimate responsibility.  O’Reilly called him a coward for not taking responsibility for what happened.  I agree.
Anyone can lose a business.  Most of us have.  Anyone can make a poor decision.  We all have.  Anyone can do something they regret that hurt others.  Again, we all have.  But there is a right way and a wrong way to handle those things.  You are in control.  Stand up and take responsibility.  George admitted he chopped down the proverbial cherry tree.  I assume he got a whuppin.  Then he went on to be the first president of the USA.  What if he’d said, “Hey, it’s not my fault the tree got chopped down.  What kind of person would put a cherry tree there anyway?  I didn’t know what I was doing.  I had the axe in my hand and I was just swept away in a series of bad decsions.  It wasn’t me who did it.  It was a bad set of circumstances that’s to blame.
What a crock.  I respect people who take responsibility for what they do.  If you did something great, stand up and take a bow.  You’ve earned it.  If you did something stupid, stand up and take your medicine.  You’ve earned that too.  You can’t say that all the good things that happened were because of you, and all the bad were because of something beyond your control.  The knife cuts both ways.  If you want my respect, be a man.  Take responsibility.  Act with integrity and honor (we don’t use that word as much as we used to, but it’s a powerful word that conveys much.)  Anything less is unacceptable — to me, to you, and to everyone else.
The only thing you will take with you when you leave this life is your knowledge, your experience and your integrity (or lack thereof.)  The thing you leave here is your name and your reputation.  What will people say about you when you’re gone?  Will they remember you as a person of integrity, or will they remember you as the victim?  You life story is nothing more than the sum of the choices you’ve made.  From small to large each decision you make writes another chapter in the story of your life.  There will be no footnotes in this story — only the outcome of the decisions you made.  You are in charge.  You are the captain of your own destiny.  Don’t let go of the wheel and don’t turn it over to someone (anyone) else.